flashback // spring break 1999

several years ago, i had another blog.  i had 17 followers.  i wrote about relationships and dating and all the douche bags i met along the way.  one day, though, i wrote about the one and only college spring break adventure i ever had.  in honor of spring break 2012, i bring you…spring break 1999.  enjoy. 

…i was 19 and a student at southwest missouri state university. my friends and i decided that we had to go somewhere and party it up, so we chose daytona. not only was it a prime location for spring breakers, but my friend jamie’s cousin lived nearby, so we had a place to stay.

our adventure started with the 4 of us hopping on a greyhound bus. for the life of me, i cannot fathom why we thought this would be a good idea…it.was.horrible. the bus left from springfield, MO and we were to arrive, 16 hours and 37 minutes later, in jacksonville, fl. from there, we had to get on another bus to get to a small town outside of daytona. let me tell you…the characters we met on that bus were something else. not only that, but our stops were in small towns and the only thing we could get that remotely resembled food, was in vending machines. looking back…you gotta do these ridiculous things when you’re younger…awful at the time, but so much fun to talk about later in life… to this day, my dad still enjoys telling people that i called him and begged for a plane ticket back.

anyway, we finally got to our destination and started our spring break.  we went to the beach, met new peeps, drank a lot, etc…after a couple days of that nonsense, we decided to head to daytona. we spent the day in the sun – drinking, meeting boys and playing in the water. since we didn’t want to drive back, we got ready in the guys’ hotel room and hit the town in search of fun.

we end up at a bar that is packed with spring breakers, loud music and debauchery. a couple of hours in and more than a “few sheets to the wind”…my friends approach me and tell me that we’re entering the bikini contest. i’m drunk…and if you know “drunk paige”, you know she’s my evil twin and she’s down for pretty much anything. that being said, of course we’re entering the bikini contest!  duh.   so, my friends tell me to follow some woman with a clipboard to the back of the stage. i remember looking over my shoulder and realizing that my friends weren’t following me anymore. …hmmmm, odd. meanwhile, clipboard girl is handing me a t-shirt that is advertising trojan condoms. (real original) she tells me to hold onto it, as i’ll need it later… at that point, i see one of my friends (oh good!) and i ask why she’s not getting ready for the contest… that’s when she laughs and admits that they only signed me up… uuuuhhhhhh…what?! bitches! she walks off and leaves me with 5 other girls who are participating. all five of them are serious about this contest.  they’re all wearing metallic, hot pink or bright, “butt floss” bikinis and stripper heels. wanna know what i’m wearing? a roxy bathing suit…full bottoms…butterflies and flowers. oh and flip-flops. i’m thinking – holy hell…what have i gotten myself into? turns out, whoever wins this contest, goes to another contest in miami and from there (you’ll never believe this) the hawaiian tropic bikini contest. i mean, this is a big deal to these girls…and i am clearly out-of-place with my cute bikini and pixie cut. 

so…the mc/dj comes backstage to prepare us. when he calls my name, i’m to come out on stage, do a sexy little dance, take off the t-shirt and strut around in my bikini. i’m so nervous, i’m about to throw up. actually…i’m nervous as i write this because i’m reliving it! anyway, i happen to peek out from backstage and there are hundreds of  people packed in this bar and on the dance floor…waiting…for girls in bikinis…and i’m one of those girls…

the music is loud, the crowd is cheering…the first girl goes on stage…lots of cheering, hooting and hollering…good times. i’m up next and it goes something like this…

AND NOW WE WELCOME PAIGE FROM SOUTHWEST MISSOURI STATE UNIVERSITY!! the crowd starts cheering, the music is so loud, i run out on stage, i start doing a cheesy stripper routine to ease the shirt off, i strut around a little bit, do a few spins, the crowd is cheering, men are whistling (seriously, they were!)  i’m not gonna lie.  i kinda got into it.  and then i have an idea…because i’m wearing full bottoms instead of “butt floss” (like the hookers backstage)…i stop gyrating, turn around so that my back is to the crowd, and i proceed to hike my bikini bottoms so far up my butt so that i give myself a wedgie.  hey, if ya can’t beat em, join em!  the crowd goes nuts.  it was pretty funny.   

needless to say, i didn’t win the contest; however, for the rest of the night…i was “the girl from the bikini contest.”  i didn’t have to buy drinks, people wanted pictures with me…it was hysterical.  and such a fun memory.

i was a little nervous about posting this, as i don’t want you to get the wrong idea about me.  it was all in good fun.  so, thanks for reading!  i thought sharing this story would be something different…a break from shop updates and baby photos. 

if you have a spring break story, you’d like to share, please do in the comment section!

happy spring breaking.

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7 thoughts on “flashback // spring break 1999

  1. ha, i love it! i think we’ve all done some questionable things around the age of 19 (dear god).

    also, i’m kind of jealous. the only spring break i ever went on was to london, in march. needless to say there were no bikinis!

    laura

  2. i almost couldn’t even finish this story when i heard the words ‘southwest missouri state university.’ WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!! we went to school that close to each other???? ugh!!! if only we knew then what we know now! but i totally love the faux butt floss. seriously, that shit works. just ask matt :)

  3. This makes me kinda sad for myself hahaha. I had my daughter when I was 19, so I never really got the whole normal spring break thing. I’m thinking that that means I should run out and do something ridiculous this week. Why isn’t there spring break for adults? Imagine it … bankers, teachers, stay at home moms and constructions workers going wild in Daytona.

    I’m glad you posted this … it gave me a giggle this morning!

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